Smurfer's blog

A Little Help

We went to a Fetish club again. It was our third time at this particular one (see blog entry Demure & Intrepid for visit #1).

It's a fair drive for us to get to the club being at least an hour and a half which makes for a late night.

We missed most of the evening event that showed off various kinks but stayed for the play party. It was neat to see how they transformed the show back into a play space.

Memories of an Oasis

Some time ago we attended our first sex club. We spent a lot of time in or around the outdoor heated pool. We watched a little bit but the attendees we observed were a little shy.

There wasn't much socializing going on but the staff was nice. We did two very memorable things.

Erotic Fiction

Lately I've been trying my hand at erotic fiction. The sort of fiction I wish there was available for me to read. A couple of the short stories are more for SS. She did a write-up at my request (as part of an embarrassment session as I had her read it to me while I brought myself to climax) which I took and copyedited with some liberty.

I do small press publishing as a hobby business, helping new authors get their career going and creating projects like anthologies and games. I have never done erotic fiction before but much of what I read seems so tame.

Consequences

I was going to write a post about aftercare but "consequences" is on my mind.

I often feel like people in general are unaware that actions have consequences. They just do what they do and turn a blind eye to what they cause.

Understanding consequences in a DD/lg relationship seems doubly important. I'm not saying you must foresee all consequences, I'm saying you need to be aware that there are always consequences or results to every action and we need to watch for them.

Kinkster Excuse

I'm not so much astonished as simply saddened that I keep seeing people break vows in the name of kink.

Specifically on FetLife, I see an overwhelming support toward leaving a spouse to jump into various fetishes and relationships.

No, it's not everyone, but the fetish culture seems to promote breaking relationships asunder.

Each situation is it's own unique and complex tapestry however this is not about judging any one person. I'm just stepping back and looking at FetLife and watching the traps that may snare me.

Value

Lately I feel like a toy.

I realize that despite my theoretical Dom label in the relationship with my lg, I exist for her pleasure and her pleasure alone. She takes the experiences she wants, while my pleasure is shrugged off into a future possibility to tantalize me and keep me in line. I don't take what I want because what I want can not be taken. It has to be voluntarily given. At times it seems like it has and then it's taken away. It's the carrot on a stick.

My little loves me...

We have been growing and overcoming speedbumps lately. It seems that before I can put together an article about our current obstacle, we resolve it. Some issues become totally resolved, others are at least on their way. Certainly some may return however we keep getting stronger.

We do have an unbalanced physical relationship, however lately that's another thing which has improved. My little girl is starting to understand that her Daddy needs voluntary attention from time to time and has acted upon this understanding. I'm very proud of her.

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